Design Dilemmas

Episode 47: This week we're talking about shelves - floating or brackets? How to paint scruffy floorboards and stairs, making the front of your house look pretty and outdoor offices/reading rooms.

This week, our house has been hit by GCSE Mocks. I say ‘hit’ but really, you’d never know if you were to judge it on the amount of revision taking place. It started well on Monday, to be fair to Leo, with a full two and a half hours sitting at my desk by himself doing test papers, dwindling to half an hour dedicated to German by Wednesday before heading for the darts board. From now to the beginning of June, our lives will be a constant mix of haranguing, shouting and finally, bribery as the GCSE season draws to a close and I can send him off to Leeds Festival with a sleeping bag and a roll of Cushelle quilted for a well earned three day break. For me, obvs.

I blame his lack of attention to speaking a different language entirely on myself. I never mastered any other than English (on some days, even that’s quite a dubious claim) which has been one of my most huge regrets as I’ve got older. We did Chinese and French at my school, neither of which I ever concentrated on fully and as a result, can only swear or count to ten in Chinese and have only the most rudimentary knowledge of le Francais. If you need someone to direct you in French to the tourist information centre, however, I am your woman. It pains me greatly, although not as much, I am sure, as the avalanche of French citizens I have attempted to converse with over my years of visiting their country. Sorry, everyone. I also wish that I spoke Spanish, another great regret. I will always remember going on holiday to Benalmedina when Ella was five to find that thanks to Dora The Explorer, she had a better handling of the Spanish language than I did. Shameful.

But back to your quandaries and this week, we’re discussing a five varied subjects which have come via my lovely subscribers and my Instagram DM box. First of all we’re talking about shelves - floating or brackets? And how can this be done on a budget? I’ve enlisted the now retired Miles, The Worlds Best Decorator (he’s only about 35 btw, he’s retired in order to set up a gin distillery in the wilds of Scotland called Igneous) to give his top tips on prepping and painting that will last the course when it comes to flaky floorboards and stairs that don’t chip. And finally, how to make the outside of your house look at pretty as the inside and my evening investigation into garden rooms, where I ended up almost ordering a corner pod to read my book in peace.

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